Old Guards

Actor Robert De Niro turned 65 this past August, while Al Pacino, his onscreen costar in the newly released “Righteous Kill” is now 68. After appearing together in just one scene in 1995’s "Heat," movie fans have longed for another onscreen pairing of the legendary actors. Although both men were nominated for Oscars for their work in “The Godfather, Part II” in 1974, they shared no scenes together. With “Righteous Kill” the wait is over, but the result is less then satisfying. Couldn’t Hollywood produce a more fitting script for these two legends of the modern silver screen other than this routine CSI-style cop drama?De Niro and Pacino play veteran NYPD detectives, who revisit a case they solved years ago only to stumble upon a possible serial killer who may or may not turn out to be a cop. And when a child killer is acquitted and set free, the two aging detectives conspire to put him behind bars by planting evidence in the case. Turk (De Niro) and Rooster (Pacino) like many movie cops in recent memory break as many laws solving crimes as the criminals do that they put behind bars. As unbelievable as it seems to have two elder police detectives doing the work of men usually twenty or thirty years their junior, De Niro almost pulls it off at times. Pacino is the harder sell, appearing more weathered and too tired to be kicking down doors anymore. This suspension of disbelief is made slightly bearable only by the charm of the film’s two stars. If you ever saw 1975’s “Brannigan,” which featured a 67 year old John Wayne as a Chicago cop hunting down a mobster while visiting London you’ll know what I mean. Director Jon Avnet injects a gimmick only 20 minutes into the movie that will make the inevitable conclusion come as no surprise to the film’s audience. I certainly figured it out early on and just in case you somehow missed it, just pay a bit more attention to those silly nicknames Turk and Rooster that scriptwriter Russell Gerwirtz came up with. The addition of two younger detectives on the case played by John Leguizamo and Donnie Wahlberg, (veterans themselves of many a cop drama) add virtually nothing to the film’s uninspired plot or running time. And the minor subplot featuring Carla Gugino (“American Gangster” and TV’s “Entourage”) as Turk’s kinky girlfriend and fellow cop just passes the time until the final scene plays out. Gerwitz won praise for his tight script for 2006’s “Inside Man,” but this time around he relies too much on conventional plotlines and familiar characters that lack any real cleverness or depth to be really interesting. While watching “Righteous Kill” I kept thinking about the last onscreen paring of Burt Lancaster and Kirk Douglas in “Tough Guys” made in 1986. Even a pedestrian film like that had more charm and cleverness and offered more genuine character development to it’s stars then “Righteous Kill” does. When making a police thriller with stars like De Niro and Pacino, who gave seminal performances in films like “Taxi Driver” and “Serpico,” wouldn’t a filmmaker like David Fincher (“Seven,” “Zodiac”) be more appropriate? One can only imagine what Martin Scorsese, whose Oscar-winning “The Departed” seem to inspire much of “Righteous Kill’s” 101 minutes, would have done with the material. It’s not too late of course, maybe the right script will come along that will offer these two genuine actors of the big screen a chance to pair up once more in something more rewarding for both them and their audience.

Missing In Action Redux!

In 1992, Ben Stiller created and starred in a weekly comedy variety show for HBO which parodied movies, television shows and commercials with hilarious results. “The Ben Stiller Show,” only lasted one season, but it launched it’s young star and creator on a promising career in comedy. Sixteen years later, Stiller uses his many talents as a writer, actor and director in bringing a laugh-filled parody of the Hollywood war film genre to the big screen.
In the 1980s when Stanley Kubrick made “Full Metal Jacket,” and Oliver Stone won an Oscar for his “Platoon,” many of the films actors were made to train in a mock boot-camp before production. In “Tropic Thunder,” Stiller (along with actor-turned-writer Justin Theroux who co-wrote the script) takes that idea one step further by transporting his actors right into a drug cartel controlled jungle in southeast Asia. In turn the actors are forced to become real soldiers while making this movie within a movie.
Stiller plays Tugg Speedman, an action movie star whose made one sequel too many who teams up with Australian actor Kirk Lazarus (Robert Downey Jr.) and comic star Jeff Portnoy (Jack Black) to make a big budgeted film version of a popular Vietnam war novel.
As Kirk Lazarus, Downey takes on a daring task of portraying a Russell Crowe-like Australian actor so committed to his role of a black soldier that he has his skin surgically dyed to play the role. Downey steals just about every scene he’s in along with Brandon T. Jackson as Alpa Chino a rapper-turned actor who is constantly offended by Lazarus’ staying-in-character during the shoot. If this may seem offensive to some, Stiller’s Tugg Speedman had just recently starred in a dramatic film called “Simple Jack,” playing a mentally challenged farmer whose performance is a favorite of the drug cartel who will soon hold Speedman captive in the jungle.
Then there is Jack Black’s character of Jeff Portnoy, a heroin-addicted comedy star who is best known for his series of film comedies where flatulence takes center stage. Black handles most of the low-brow humor in the film but with his usual charm that makes it all somehow tolerable.
But “Tropic Thunder” is much more then a parody of war films, Stiller also lets loose on actors, agents, managers, studio heads, writers, directors and anyone else he can think of along the way. Tom Cruise makes a hilarious unbilled appearance in the film as a vulgar, grotesque studio head who will no doubt appear all too real to those who work in the industry.
Steve Coogan plays Damien Cockburn the British director in over his head in trying to bring this big budget war film to the screen. Cockburn’s exit early in the film is graphically disturbing yet undeniably funny. For Stiller, who grew up in Hollywood as the son of actor/comedians Jerry Stiller and Anne Meara, he must have had plenty of background experiences to draw from in lampooning the self-absorbed culture of tinsel town and it’s players.
For fans of “Platoon”, “Apocalypse Now”, “Full Metal Jacket” and the “Missing in Action” franchise, “Tropic Thunder” is a feast. Many scenes in “Thunder” are directly inspired from those in the aforementioned films. And if you’ve ever seen “Hearts of Darkness: A Filmmaker‘s Apocalypse,” the documentary shot by Francis Ford Coppola’s wife, Eleanor about the making of “Apocalypse Now”, you’ll know where Stiller got most of his inspiration.
“Tropic Thunder” is reminiscent of Mel Brooks’ “Blazing Saddles,” a perfect parody of an often-made film genre, but with plenty of vulgar and equal opportunity offensive humor to go around. Stiller has a keen eye for mocking the industry he grew up in and a fearless attitude in it’s presentation. “Tropic Thunder” is not for everyone, it will offend some and make most others laugh. I know I laughed a lot during the film’s 107 minutes but felt equally as bad for doing so at times.
Ben Stiller Movies

Unlikely Hero!

Will Smith returned to movie theaters this past 4th of July weekend proving once again that he, along with fireworks and backyard barbeques are essential to celebrating our nation’s birthday. “Hancock” is an unlikely superhero careless in his execution of superhuman deeds and miserable in his own life filled with public drunkenness and foulmouthed exchanges with the public he is charged to protect. Will Smith has a blast portraying the title role of John Hancock, who is as clueless to the origins of his own special powers as those mere mortals around him. His penchant for destroying millions of dollars worth of public property while trying to save those in peril have finally caught up with him at the film’s opening. The news media (including Nancy Grace) have called for his arrest for outstanding warrants for the millions in damages he has caused for the tax payers of Los Angeles. After inadvertently saving the life of PR man Ray Embrey (Jason Bateman), Hancock is forced to give into Ray’s attempts to reinvent the disgraced superhero’s public persona. Those efforts lead to much of the first hour of the film’s comic genius at times turning the formula of the superhero genre completely over on it’s head. Hancock’s short temper and often crude sense of justice make his attempt to clean up his act not only difficult but extremely entertaining for the audience. Through most of the film, director Peter Berg borrows from Richard Donner’s Superman playbook in attempting to give “Hancock” a realistic look or what Donner called his use of verisimilitude in making an unbelievable story believable. Berg’s Hancock is a superhero whose actions have consequences something that even Donner failed to realize in his classic 1978 Superman film. After a short stint in prison, the reinvented Hancock appears on the scene to stop a bank heist, during which echoes of John William’s Superman march can be heard ever so slightly in composer John Powell’s less bombastic approach to scoring of a superhero movie. It’s only in the second half of the film’s short 92 minute running time that things bog down as the superhero’s origin is somewhat explained. When Ray’s wife, Mary (Charlize Theron) cast doubt on Hancock’s ability to reinvent himself, we later learn that her concern for her husband and son are not the only interest she has in mind. This complicated relationship with the film’s star leads to a most unexpected plot surprise which although welcomed tends to interrupt the rhythm of the film to a fault. What started as a unique and fresh take on the superhero film genre slowly evolves into a conventional comic book style story. The short running time and likeability of it’s star manage to keep it from completely falling apart. Smith who provided last year’s sci-fi thrill-ride in “I Am Legend,” once again through charm and pure onscreen charisma delivers the goods in this tailor-made role. One only hopes that although the film’s ending leaves plenty of room for a continuing franchise of sequels, that the capable star will deliver more challenging roles that have lead to his two Oscar nominations in years past.

Kung Fu Fighting Panda

Kung Fu Panda is the latest offering from the animation wing at Dreamworks studios, who in the past brought us the likes of "Shrek" and last year's "Bee Movie." "Panda" steers clear of the pop-culture references that permeated those other animated tales in favor of a more traditional story this time around with a lovable flawed character at it's center. Jack Black's Po, a Kung Fu loving Panda in the Valley of Peace, is part Curly Howard, Spanky McFarland and Elmer Fudd all wrapped up in a fuzzy Panda Bear costume, albeit a digital one. The animation is at times breathtaking, coupled with a sweeping music score by John Powell and Hans Zimmer, but at the core of the film lies a touching and funny performance by it's star, Black. Jack Black is no stranger to animation, having voiced Lenny in 2004's "Shark Tale," but he's grown as an actor since then and his Po stirs both pathos and belly-laughs (quite literally). Po works in his father's noodle shop, Mr. Ping (voiced by the prolific Asian actor James Hong) but all the while dreams of his heroes "the furious five," a collection of Kung Fu warriors voiced by the likes of Angelina Jolie and Jackie Chan to name a few. After a hilarious hi jinks accident, Po is mistakenly chosen as the "Dragon Warrior," and is enlisted to battle the film's bad guy, the dreaded Tai Lung. A fallen hero in the body of a white tiger with an axe to grind, Tai Lung is voiced ferociously by English actor, Ian McShane. Po of course has no formal martial arts training, but with the help of Dustin Hoffman's Shifu, a "Jedi-like" master, Po is trained in the ways of the great warriors. Po's journey is a touching one. He doubts himself at first as does master Shifu, but when Po's stop-at-nothing penchant for finding food is discovered, the old master finds the key to training this most unlikely of warriors. The martial arts fighting sequences are often reminiscent of the old Warner Brother's cartoons, where no one gets hurt when falling great distances and suffering such violent brawling, but it's all for laughs and completely harmless. And laughs are frequent and genuine thanks to Po's narcissism and self-doubt and just being so darn lovable. Black finds funny little asides that are animated quite realistically by a team of animators listed at the films end who all deserve credit for the final performance. The relationship between Hoffman's Shifu, Hong's Mr. Ping and Po respectfully, is completely believable and often touching. Po is completely honest in his own way, and his constant efforts to please make him all the more likable. With fine direction by animators-turned directors, John Stevenson and Mark Osborne, Panda paints a broad portrait in beautiful wide-screen of an ancient Chinese world inhabited entirely by animals prevalent in Asian culture. Even it's closing credits are beautifuly animated all to the sounds of 1974s "Kung Fu Fighting," sung here by Cee-Lo Green and Jack Black. Written by a team of writers with backgrounds in TVs "King of the Hill" and martial arts films like "Bulletproof Monk," it's story may seem simplistic and not one hundred percent original, but it takes you in hook, line and sinker thanks to charming and credible performances by it's stars. I found myself laughing hardily throughout right along with the dozens of kids-of-all-ages who also found it's title character irresistible.

Indy's Long Awaited Return

In the summer of 1981, Raiders of the Lost Ark took movie theaters across America by storm. George Lucas and Steven Spielberg had delivered a roller coaster ride of an adventure movie, deeply inspired by the Saturday morning movie serials of the 1930s and 40s. With it's massive success at the box office there was no surprise that a sequel would soon follow and in 1984 Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom was released and quickly disappointed fans of the first film. What Temple of Doom got wrong was a more slapstick style script with a muddled plotline too bizarre to follow, and the fate of any further sequels was in question. And then five years later in 1989, Spielberg and Lucas surprised us all by getting the film franchise back-on-track with what was then thought to be it's final episode. Indiana Jones and the Last Crusade had forgone the silliness of the Temple of Doom and brought back a more recognizable villain in the form of the Third Reich, who along with the addition of Sean Connery to it's cast made for a great movie adventure. So now, nineteen years later, Lucas and Spielberg have decided to squeeze another offering out of the franchise by releasing Indiana Jones and The Kingdom of the Crystal Skull this past Memorial Day weekend. It's a project that has been rumored and talked about for several years now, with everyone from Frank Darabont to M. Night Shyamalan taking a crack at the Crystal Skull script. In the end screenwriter David Koepp who worked previously on Spielberg's remake of War of the Worlds, won the task of writing the script based on Lucas' original story and what ends up on the screen is a literal mish-mash of all three previous films.
Harrison Ford reprised his role as Indiana Jones who now in his sixties moves a little slower than in previous adventures. Ford has great fun exploring the older Dr. Jones and the effect age has on his ability to go up against forces of evil, this time represented by the Russian Communist party of the 1950s. During the film's opening, the sound of Elvis Presley's "Hound Dog" can be heard blasting over a car's radio, thus setting the film apart from it's earlier 1930s and 40s-themed films respectfully. When costar Shia LaBeouf shows up as a young 1950s greaser, his entrance is a complete homage to Marlon Brando's famed entrance in 1953's The Wild One. LaBeouf wears the exact same style hat, shirt and leather jacket as did Brando in the now iconic image from that decade. Spielberg has a lot of fun with the cold war of the fifties, following the opening chase at the Area 51 air force base, a humorous although unbelievable escape from an atomic bomb test in the Nevada desert soon follows. Shades of the silliness abound in the Temple of Doom film, make appearances throughout Crystal Skull, but never enough to completely destroy the adventure as some feel it did in that second sequel. Spielberg throws in some nice homage’s to the earlier films by paying tribute to both Connery's elder Jones character as well as the late Denholm Elliott's befuddled Marcus Brody. Even Karen Allen returns as Marion Ravenwood, Indy's love interest from the first Raiders film, back this time to explain the existence of the Shia LeBeouf character! Allen has a few light scenes with Ford, but fails to capture the same feistiness she brought to the role back in 1981. It was nice to hear John Williams' Marion's Theme played once again although briefly in the film's score. At the heart of the film's story is the adventure brought about by the search for the Crystal Skull and it's relationship to an ancient culture that may have it's roots in other-worldly influences. And unlike the strong mythologies rooted in the first and third films, this muddled mess of an ancient Amazon culture somehow relating to inter-dimensional beings just doesn't payoff. In Raiders of the Lost Ark, the strong influence of the Nazi's grasp for power by way of the Lost Ark of the Covenant or again in Last Crusade's search for the Holy Grail offered far-greater tension and believability to an already unbelievable genre.

Steven Spielberg Movies

Spaghetti Western Meets Martial Arts

In “The Forbidden Kingdom,” martial arts stars Jackie Chan and Jet Li come together for the first time onscreen in this latest offering from animator-turned-director, Rob Minkoff. In this mythical tale, an American teen obsessed with Hong Kong cinema travels back in time to ancient China on a quest to free an imprisoned king with the help of three martial arts warriors. The film is a visual feast for adolescent fans of martial arts and modern video games no doubt, but for older audiences, “Kingdom” will at times seem inspired by everything from “The Wizard of Oz” to Sergio Leone’s “Once Upon a Time in the West.” The film begins with an inventive opening title sequence where classic martial arts film posters are interwoven with the film’s credits. We then find Michael Angarano as JASON a young Boston teen rummaging through a Chinatown pawnshop run by it’s ancient caretaker, Old Hop. In what is an obvious set-up of an “Oz“-like wrap-around story soon becomes a moment reminiscent of the first few minutes of 1984’s “Gremlins.” During a street fight with local thugs, Jason is somehow transported back in time to ancient China. He soon hooks up with drunken warrior Lu Yan played with great charm by the now 54 year-old Jackie Chan. Chan’s character seems very much inspired by Jason Robards’ Cheyenne, the coffee drinking gunslinger in Leone’s 1968 “Once Upon a Time in the West.” Only Chan’s Lu Yan has an addiction to wine rather than java this time around. As Lu Yan and Jason travel they meet up with Golden Sparrow, a Pipa (Chinese guitar) playing warrior who fills in for Charles Bronson’s Harmonica from the aforementioned “Once Upon a Time in the West.” By the time they are joined by Jet Li’s Silent Monk character, the “Oz”-inspired journey begins. The warriors then set out to find the castle of the Jade Warlord (think Henry Fonda’s assassin gang leader Frank again inspired by “Once Upon a Time in the West”) in hopes of freeing the imprisoned Monkey-King also played by Li. If all of this sounds too much to handle in one film, it is; but thanks to the charm of most of it’s performers their journey is somewhat entertaining if not tolerable most of the time. Chan’s self-proclaimed admiration for Buster Keaton is on display here, as he easily handles the lighter moments as well as he does his martial arts skills. His English is the best of all the Asian actors onscreen, where as others have trouble delivering understandable dialogue. My suspicions of the Sergio Leone inspired spaghetti western aspects to the story were confirmed when even the musical score at times reflected the distant electric guitar motif made famous by Ennio Morricone in 68’s “Once Upon a Time in The West.” Maybe my affection for that classic 60s western shows my age a bit too much, for I’m sure to the younger audiences the comparisons to “Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon” and “The Karate Kid” are more evident. But when preparing this review I soon discovered that the film’s screenwriter, John Fusco’s next project is a remake of the classic 1954 Japanese film, “The Seven Samurai.” How fitting! That film of course would later be re-made in 1960 as “The Magnificent Seven.” I guess all things mythical and adventurous stem from a few select ideas used time and time again. Whether it’s a journey to far off lands or warriors joining forces in noble quests, every generation seems to find something original about these time honored tales. But as in the case of “The Forbidden Kingdom”, the result is muddled at best.

Jackie Chan Movies

Jet Li Movies

Sergio Leone Movies

Charlton Heston's Ass

Charlton Heston who died last week at age 83 was a terrific actor. He won two Oscars, one for his title role in Ben Hur and one for his humanitarian work. In his cameo as the Player King in 1996's Hamlet he practically stole the film away from director & star Kenneth Branagh. Personally, I was always grateful for an interview Heston gave in 1985 following the death of his friend and colleague, Orson Welles. All of the accolades were pouring in for Welles the day after he died and naturally they turned to Heston for some thoughts on his legendary friend and costar. Heston, who never minced words pointed out how hypocritical certain modern-day director/producers were to be saying such wonderful things about Welles and his influence on them, when in truth they wouldn't go near the legendary director when he came looking for help. And Heston named names too! I won't be as brave as he. But it gave me a newfound respect for a man whose politics had started to turn me off. But mostly when I think of Charlton Heston I think of his sci-fi films of the 1970s. When I first saw Planet of the Apes (1968) as a boy, I was captivated by the film and became an instant fan of the sequels and TV series. One scene in the film has Heston, as stranded astronaut Taylor hauled into a court of apes and stripped naked before them. The close-up of Heston's derriere in cinemascope was just the sort of thing that made a young kid giggle uncontrollably. I soon forgot about it, but then a few years later while watching Heston in another sci-fi film, Soylent Green (1973), it happened again. This time it was through a glass shower door as Heston was nude with his young female costar. Okay, it wasn't as funny this time around, I was older of course and it was probably just a product of the times. This was the 1970s after all and films were getting edgier. Some years later I was watching Heston in a film on cable TV late at night called The Mountain Men. Heston made the film in 1980 when he was 56. There was a scene outside a tent where once again Heston's naked backside was focused upon. Now a teen it had finally dawned on me that this must be something intentional on the part of Heston. He's always been a physical actor and has showed off his chiseled features in many films throughout his career. I don't think it ever really interfered with his performances. Being an attractive man it certainly didn't hurt his appeal with female fans. For me I never really thought of it again until 1997, when I was in a packed movie theater watching The Devil's Advocate, starring Keanu Reeves. In one scene, Reeves and a female costar begin to make love on a hard wood floor. As they slowly undress, the camera pans down to reveal a huge panavision close-up of Keanu Reeves' ass. The audience shrieked in disgust. Even the women did. It was not flattering. All the memories of Heston's rump in so many films started to flood my memory. And it was then that I finally reached a shocking conclusion. Charlton Heston, even in his fifties had a better ass than Keanu Reeves!

Charlton Heston Movies

The Crucifixion of Barack Obama

With the public crucifixion of Barack Obama this weekend on cable TV and talk radio, I couldn’t help but think of my favorite movie ever made about the Christ. Let me say at the beginning that I am in no way comparing Senator Obama to Jesus Christ. But with all the false outrage filling the airwaves and online concerning the overblown reaction to the comments by Obama’s pastor, I just can’t help but see a disturbing trend and comparison.
Made in 1979 and directed by Franco Zeffirelli, Jesus of Nazareth was an all-star mini-series offering a reverent depiction of the Christ story using stories from the Gospel. With a lush score by Maurice Jarre, and featuring a hypnotic performance by British actor, Robert Powell in the title role, Jesus of Nazareth was one of the best films to tell the Christ story. But what made me think about the film in reference to Barack Obama, was the film’s focus on the political and religious hierarchy, as well as the social and economic state of the Jewish and Roman citizens of the time. The depiction of outrage spurred on by religious zealots on both sides in bringing down this upstart who dared to preach about what was only prophecy in the minds of many and dangerous political rhetoric to others has a familiar ring this weekend. And I don’t mean because it’s Easter.
Obama’s speech on Tuesday was one for the record books. Does anyone remember George W. Bush or Bill Clinton ever being so honest and forthright in a major address before? I certainly don’t. While watching and then reading the speech again online, I couldn’t help but think about some of the scenes in Zeffirelli’s film. The ones depicting Christ’s dealings with doubters and hypocrites and the honesty in which he was depicted in doing so. And then following the speech came the expected reaction by professional media pundits whose cynicism and denial of any inspiration gained from the address seemed all-too planned-in-advance. But what truly amazed me was the increase in vitriol for the Senator by those in the media who are determined to not only destroy this upstart who dares us to talk about such taboo topics as race but who also threatens an establishment who would rather lead out of fear than with intelligence. Many of the scenes of Christ appearing before the Sanhedrin or Pontius Pilate in the film could be played along side cable news or talk radio clips dealing with the Obama speech and one would think you were watching the same movie.
I believe that Senator Obama has the possibility of being a rare gem in a chorus of duds who make up our politics today. He is a flawed man just like the rest of us. But his calm, cool, thoughtful way of dealing with the issues ahead of this country as well as his unique understanding of what divides and joins us together as a people is as inspiring to me as that British actor portraying Christ on TV almost 30 years ago.

10,000 Bad Choices!

With "10,000 B.C.”, director/screenwriter Roland Emmerich borrows a little something from every movie he’s made thus far along with every myth and factual fancy from early human history to create a new mythical story of early man’s adventures here on earth. And despite the CGI eye-candy of “Lord of the Rings”-type vistas, oversized woolly mammoth’s, prehistoric birds and saber tooth tiger’s along for the ride, “10,000 B.C. suffers from 10,000 bad choices!
Emmerich relies heavily on his prior work in 1994’s “Stargate”, but minus a teleportation device to excuse historical inaccuracies like prehistoric cavemen with boats and forged metals of all kind, “10,000 B.C.” asks far too much of it’s audience in forgoing any sense of basic logic.
I knew I was in trouble when certain tribes speak perfect English in the film, while others speak in foreign dialects accompanied by subtitles. One unintentional laugh comes when one English speaking tribesman questions how one of the foreign tribes has learned to speak the same language as he.
Co-written by composer-turned-screenwriter, Harold Kloser, what fails most in “10,000 B.C.” is a lack of interesting characters to keep us caring between the magnificent set pieces and choreographed action sequences that have become a staple in films like these. Positively wooden portrayals are delivered here by leads who despite their dread-locked hair and animal skin clothing still manage to have the prettiest teeth and hairless bodies found anywhere in prehistoric times. When a character dies in an adventure film these days and I feel absolutely nothing I blame the writer not the actor.
The basic premise in this film of a stronger tribe kidnapping and enslaving the weaker is as old as the film’s title suggests. And wrapping it in a unlikely modern-type love story does nothing to make us care for what is happening on screen. I really was hoping Raquel Welch would show up magically reviving her character “Loana” from 1966’s “One Million Years B.C.” just to spice things up a bit!
The juxtaposition of different historical timelines and topographical regions causes some head scratching along the way as well, and it would be forgivable given this was an actual episode of “Lord of the Rings”, but it’s not and it’s painfully obvious. The producers are not saying this film is history but by calling it “10,000 B.C.”, they have opened themselves up to some deserved ridicule. Where on earth and at what point in time has any of the many different tribes, civilizations and geographically-opposed peoples ever managed to live so closely together? With very little passage of time to account for, characters in this film cross so many different landscapes that one would think you could go from a sandy desert to a snow-filled mountaintop in a matter of minutes. When the pyramids of Egypt suddenly show up on screen I knew the film had lost me.
Director Emmerich has a knack for remaking and reusing material and ideas already done before. Despite the obvious nods to “Stargate” and “Lord of the Rings” found here, many ideas from other films are rehashed throughout. Not too surprising considering director Emmerich is the one who gave us 1998’s dreadful remake of “Godzilla”, along with disaster retread “The Day after Tomorrow” in 2004. So, what’s next for the budding director you may ask? Emmerich is hard at work on none other then a remake of “Fantastic Voyage”, another sci-fi flick from 1966 which it just so happens also starred Raquel Welch. One can only hope a cameo by the former screen goddess will be included to liven up that newest version of an old idea.

Oscar's 80th!

Oscar's 80th went off smoothly last night finishing only 20 minutes past it's scheduled time. Although it's too soon to see any real numbers as far as ratings go, I would be surprised to see any increase in viewer ship. On the whole the show was entertaining, thanks mostly to Jon Stewart's edgy yet still classy performance as the evenings host. His opening monologue was short and right on target. His best joke of the evening... "Democrats have an historic race going. Hillary Clinton vs. Barack Obama. Normally when you see a black man or woman president, an asteroid is about to hit the Statue of Liberty." He remained funny all evening. His relaxed style and mostly topical humor grew great laughs from the Hollywood A-list audience. Although their tepid response was clearly visible during Stewart's most controversial joke of the evening when mocking both the box-office failures of the Iraq War-themed films and Presidential candidate John McCain in saying...""I am telling you, if we stay the course and keep these movies in the theaters, we can turn this around. I don't care if it takes 100 years! Withdrawing the Iraq movies would only embolden the audience. We cannot let the audience win." It was a great joke and one I'm sure the audience completely agreed with, but it was not surprising that most were too hypocritical to respond.
My predictions about endless montages was not realized, most were short and to the point and Stewart's alternate writer strike montages were especially funny. I only wish he and his Daily Show crew had supplied more of the extremely funny faux acting award campaign ads like they did during his last outing as Oscar host.
I cared little about who wore what, fashion was never a concern to me. It was good to see all of the acting nominees present this year. The two upsets in both actress categories were unexpected and supplied the evenings only surprises.
All five of the Oscar nominated songs proved once again that the song-writing branch of the Academy is in disrepair. All three of the nominated songs from "Enchanted" were uninspired and unmemorable. Why couldn't the Academy bring back the Best Music, Original Musical or Comedy Score award which has been given from time-to-time over the years to honor one of this year's crop of musical adaptations. "Across the Universe", "Hairspray", "Once" and the brilliantly orchestrated "Sweeney Todd" were all deserving of this award.
In the end despite hosts Stewart's noble attempts, I thought the show lacked anything special for an 80th celebration. I suppose the writer's strike was settled too close to air-time to allow any great thought to be put into commemorating the occasion properly.

Late Fees!

Michel Gondry's new film "Be Kind Rewind" opened this past weekend, starring Jack Black, Mos Def and Danny Glover. Gondry, who won an Oscar for his screenplay to 2005's "Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind", again serves as writer and director of this all-too blatantly whimsical tale about two regular guys from Passaic, NJ.
Def plays Mike, a clerk in a corner video store owned by his surrogate father Mr. Fletcher(Glover) whose video library consists of nothing but old VHS tapes. Not a DVD in sight. When neighboring mechanic Jerry (Black) is suddenly magnetized by a freak accident at a nearby power plant, he inadvertently erases all of the tapes in the store's library. In an effort to replace the now useless tapes, the two amateurs take to videotaping their own 20 minute versions of the stores many titles.
As a former video store clerk myself, I must admit I was really looking forward to this film. The concept was a good one, although after it's viewing I can't help but feel that the idea was about ten years too late and more suited for a skit on a late night comedy show.
The amateur versions of films like "2001: A Space Odyssey" "Driving Miss Daisy" and "Robocop" are genuinely funny, but the intervening dialogue is so quirky and unmotivated that it hardly holds your interest.
Jack Black is a talent and can be quite charming when given the right material, but here his antics appear to be more-of-the-same and at times quite annoying. Def fairs better and is certainly the more likeable protagonist. His Mike is more appealing and sympathetic and his relationship with Glover's Fletcher seems real and genuine. Melonie Diaz has an appealing introduction in the film as a dry cleaning worker turned actress in Black and Def's amateur outings. But she quickly fades into the background as one of the many unrealized characterizations of the script. Along the way Mia Farrow and Sigourney Weaver somehow show up in small roles that are more distracting then helpful. Many of the unknown actors portraying the eccentric video store customers who eventually get in on the act are more appealing than the star cameos.
The film has a stark realistic urban look to it reminiscent of urban dramas of two decades ago, but the overdrawn characters don't quite fit the set pieces the film has created.
What does work in "Be Kind Rewind" is the wrap-around story of Mr. Fletcher's attempt to save his shop's demolition from urban renewal as well as his infatuation with jazz pianist Fats Waller. Fletcher has fooled Mike into believing his store is the birthplace of the famous jazz great. The eventual plot-turn the Waller story plays in the film's final scenes work well but arrive too late to matter. Yet, Glover's work is the strongest in the film and you can't help but feel for this antique of a character whose only real vice is his fading attempt to hold on to the past.
I really wanted to like this movie. But it felt like I was watching something made many, many years ago that I had always meant to see, but in the end didn't live up to it's reputation. Although I found the film's conclusion rewarding, the often useless meandering by the films other two stars don't allow any genuine moments to add up to much.

Oscar Predictions

Okay! I haven't seen enough of the Oscar-nominated films this year to venture an opinion by way of prophecy, but I will make one prediction. Once again as in the past several years, the Oscar telecast will be watched by less and less people. Last year's show was up a little thanks to host Ellen DeGeneres, but the ratings haven't quite reached the soaring number it had back in 1998 thanks to James Cameron's "Titanic." In fact of all the films nominated in the main categories this year, only "Juno" and "Sweeney Todd" have broken the 100 million mark worldwide. Box office champs like "Ratatouille" and "Bourne Ultimatum" are nominated in some of the lower categories but seldom do Best Art Direction nominations lead to high ratings for the Oscar broadcast. I'm not suggesting that "Spiderman 3" and "Transformers" deserve Best Picture Nods, but in a year where the favorite films in all the main categories only add up to barely what the two top box office earners made worldwide, maybe a shorter Oscar show is in order. With only one special Oscar being awarded this year, I'm sure the rest of the program will consist of endless montages to films past. I use to like these montages back in the early 1990s when filmmakers like Chuck Workman really had something to tell with careful selection and juxtaposition of certain film clips. But in recent years the montages seem to be for montage sake and are often uninspired. Wouldn't be nice to use some of that time to honor someone like Maureen O'Hara who never won an Oscar. How many classic movies does a girl have to be in before she's recognized? (How Green Was My Valley, Hunchback of Notre Dame, Miracle on 34th Street, and The Quiet Man to name a few!) Or maybe an extended look at Oscar telecasts from the past would be in order. There are many ways they could make a four hour program entertaining throughout, I can only hope that Jon Stewart and his team at the Daily Show can find enough humor besides the obvious election year coverage he is known for to keep us awake.

Oscar Watch

Video on Demand, Part V

In 1934, Conrad Aiken wrote his most famous short story,

"Silent Snow, Secret Snow." It went on to become one of the most widely read American short stories of the twentieth-century. Thirty-seven years later in 1971, Rod Serling's Night Gallery would adapt this short tale as part of its weekly anthology series. With a teleplay and direction by Emmy Award-nominated Gene R. Kearney, the episode remains one of the finest half-hours from 1970s television. Being only five years old in 1971, I must admit that I didn't catch this telling of Aiken's tale until I saw it as a late-night rerun in 1978. Being twelve at the time, the same age as Aiken's protagonist in the story is probably one of the reasons it had such an impact on me.
"Silent Snow, Secret Snow" tells the story of young Paul Hasleman and his slow decent into madness. When Paul awakens one morning to the sound of the postman’s muffled footsteps on the street below, his belief that it has snowed the night before is shattered when he discovers the sun-draped lawn outside his window. Paul's discovery of a "secret snow" begins his slow detachment from the real world around him.
Night Gallery is probably best known for it's weekly horror stories and strange tales book ended with introductions by it's host, writer Rod Serling. Serling worked more often as a host than writer on the program, unlike his more famous Twilight Zone series of the 1950s and 60s. For Twilight Zone, Serling took a more active role in weekly production, and it shows. Night Gallery only ran for three seasons, and only a handful of episodes remain memorable in viewers minds. But the ones that do were strong, and often were based on famous and some not-so-famous short stories. Contemporary writers like Richard Matheson, and Serling provided among the best of the series along with adaptations by classic authors like Aiken and even Edgar Allen Poe.
"Silent Snow, Secret Snow" is told from the perspective of young Paul, played by then eleven year-old actor, Radames Pera. Pera, who would go on to play Young Caine in the famed 1970s TV series Kung Fu, is quite revealing as the troubled Paul. His soulful eyes focuses the viewers attention almost immediately, and as his fascination with the "secret snow" progresses, Pera's conveyance of pure pathos is at times overwhelming.
Two other great contributions to the episodes success are it's music score and narration. The compelling and haunting musical score by composers Paul Glass and Oliver Nelson strike just the right chord between setting the tone and providing effective underscoring. The music at times sounds mournful evoking images of longing and sympathy.
The narration is by the legendary Orson Welles. Just a few moments of dialogue are interspersed between the raspy baritone of Welles' telling which accounts for the bulk of the story's narrative. Remarkably, Welles' never responded to the offer sent to him along with the script by director Kearney for the project, and only at the proverbial 11th hour did a tape arrive bearing Welles narration. Welles was famous for this sort of thing, but in the end, the effect is mesmerizing.
Universal Home Video released the first season of Night Gallery on DVD in 2004. Unfortunately, "Silent Snow, Secret Snow" originally aired in October of 1971 during the shows second season. What is keeping Universal from releasing the second and third seasons of the program is unknown. One can only hope that they will complete the collection at sometime in the near future. The episode was available at onetime through Columbia House Home Video, and VHS tapes from that series can be found on Ebay from time-to-time.
In the end the combination of performance, music and the effective storytelling by Welles allows the audience watching to somehow share in Paul's alienation from the world around him. It's a remarkable achievement for 1970s television, to tell a story so innately poetic. One doubts that anything of this kind with such great lyricism could find its way onto the airwaves today.

Video on Demand, Part IV

Video on Demand, Part III

Video on Demand, Part II

Video on Demand, Part I

Woody in London

Woody Allen's "Cassandra's Dream" which opened recently at the Ritz East in Center City, Philadelphia is the Oscar-winning director's third film in a row made entirely on location in England. Starting with 2005's "Matchpoint", Allen's change of location from New York City to the streets of modern-day London has been a breath of fresh air for fans of the director. As in "Matchpoint", Allen abandons his neurosis-driven, self-absorbed characters of films past for a more serious tone of tragedy and murder with very little traces of the humor that has often made the filmmaker famous.
Ewan McGregor and Colin Farrell play two working-class London brothers whose taste for success and the better things in life lead them to commit a crime so terrible that it eventually serves as their undoing.
As Ian, the older and supposedly wiser of the two siblings, McGregor works in his father’s restaurant all the while dreaming of a better life as a businessman in America. Terry (Farrell), is the younger brother, a chronic gambler in dept too deep to loan sharks to see any legitimate way out of his lot in life. So when a successful uncle and businessman named Howard (underplayed with his usual scene-stealing flare by Oscar-nominated actor Tom Wilkinson) visits London, the two nephews seek his help financially. But it is Howard who in turn needs the brothers help in making a possible prison term for a bad business deal go away. It seems a witness who intends to testify against Uncle Howard in court will have to disappear for good to ensure the rich uncle’s survival.
With promises of financial independence from Uncle Howard, the two brothers embark on a disastrous journey of a loss of morality and the tragic consequences it brings to them and their family.
This is a tragedy of Greek proportion, but with no chorus along to try to influence the two young men in making their fateful decisions.
As in “Matchpoint”, Allen has changed his whole approach to moviemaking. Gone are the pop songs from the 1930s and ‘40s that usually underscore his films, replaced here with a minimalist score by composer Phillip Glass. Photographed by Oscar-winning cinematographer Vilmos Zsigmond, Allen shoots the streets of London with a less romantic style as he does in New York. A more realistic look onscreen lends this tragic story the atmosphere it needs. One feels we are eavesdropping on this family and Allen is cautious in letting style tell this story visually.
At the core of this film is the relationship onscreen between brothers Ian and Terry. These are two of the most sympathetic yet serious flawed characters Allen has ever written. You can’t help but feel for these boys no matter how deep they get into things, because no matter how terrible and misguided their actions, they are likable to the core.
The likeability of Ian and Terry has a lot to do with the two actors who portray them. Farrell and McGregor are almost too believable as brothers on film. They share no great resemblance in appearance, yet by the childhood memories they both recall with great fondness one would think that they actually do share a last name. These are two fully realized great performances for both young actors. Farrell has given his career a great boost with his work here, and it will hopefully translate to more revealing film roles for him in the future.
My only criticism here is Allen’s portrayal of women in this film. Unlike his “Annie Hall” and any one of the many characters played by his former onscreen muse, Mia Farrow, the women in this film are almost all portrayed as “eye candy”. Ian and Terry have girlfriends, but both are portrayed here as needy and one dimensional. Only British actress Clare Higgins as the boys mother gives an effective performance past the little Allen has given her in the script.
With that in mind, Woody Allen does deliver a fine tragedy on film, one that draws you in slowly and will stay with you long after you’ve left the theater. A remarkable feat for a filmmaker who spent most of his life on film trying to make us laugh.

27 Yawns!

“27 Dresses” opened in movie theaters this past weekend to the delight of 16 year-olds everywhere. Surely that’s the audience this cliché-ridden, contrived exercise in futility is being marketed to, or at least it seemed to be at the film’s opening I attended.
TV’s Katherine Heigl stars as Jane, a 27-time bridesmaid (never the bride) who through a series of unbelievable and improbable coincidences finds Mr. Right by the film’s closing credits. Those same credits are by-the-way the most entertaining and original aspect of the entire film. It’s just the other 104 minutes that are extremely painful and laborious to watch.
“Enchanted’s” James Marsden is on hand here to play a more cynical Prince Charming this time around, whose smiles regardless of his often flat uninspired one-liners delighted the mostly teenaged female audience in attendance. Heigl and Marsden work hard to make us like them here, sometimes too hard, it’s just the contrivance of the material they are given that betrays their efforts.
Marsden’s character Kevin, a writer for the Commitments section of a major New York newspaper who stumbles upon Heigl’s character at a wedding during the film’s opening, is predictably cynical of marriage and the subject he covers. Heigl’s Jane, is the all-around girlfriend to so many who will not only plan your wedding but often show up as a bridesmaid if needed. So when Jane’s younger sister, Tess falls for Jane’s boss George (Edward Burns), it’s here that the romantic comedy of errors begins… or so they thought.
Of course Jane has always had a secret crush on her perfect boss George, and is alone in her secret pain at first but eventually Kevin catches on, and “of course” slowly falls for the lifelong bridesmaid, Jane. Ah, but not so fast, Jane is “of course” weary of Kevin and his cynicism towards marriage, so through a series of predictable film montages (made-up of flat sight-gags accompanied by popular pop-songs) the two slowly learn to like and maybe even love each other along the way.
Aline Brosh McKenna is most to blame here with her inability to write real-sounding dialogue. This is McKenna’s first offering since her adaptation of Lauren Weisberger’s “The Devil Wears Prada” made a more successful transition to the screen in 2006. Maybe screenplay adaptation is more her style. If I find my thoughts drifting during conversations between characters on screen in any movie I usually blame the writer. If I am bored by what I am seeing on screen I often hear Tommy Lee Jones’ character from “The Fugitive” yelling very loudly… “I don’t care!“ I heard that a lot here.
All the performers in “27 Dresses” try hard despite what they have been given, it’s only Malin Akerman’s Tess, who regardless of her physical beauty gives an overdone and at times amateurish performance that grows most weary throughout.
Choreographer/Actress-turned director Anne Fletcher does what she can with the bland material, but offers very little visually. I often found what was going on in the background more interesting than what was supposed to be holding my attention focused in front of me.
If fresh, edgy new comedy is what your looking for in films, spare yourself the $9.50 and try to catch a matinee of “Juno.” This year’s truly inspired new comedy.